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And if the woman is one of those feminist, man-haters, she might just slap you and call you a sex-crazy idiot. And the conductor might even direct the driver to take the bus to the nearest police-station. And, who knows, you might just find a place in one of the columns of some local newspaper. Well, despite such narrow-minded outlook, sexual encounters do take place in plenty. So much so that, some people travel in a crowded bus just to get such encounters. And this applies to both men and women. Believe me, there are people here who are able to relieve their sexual tensions only in the buses. In a crowded bus, men, of all ages, from sixteen to sixty, try to stand close to women. They move in slowly, deliberately. First touching with shoulders, and then with knees and arms. Their chief targets are boobs and bottoms. Bottom-pinchers are of a class of their own. They stand with innocent looking faces and, taking advantage of the crowd and the jostle, they move their hands like the. That’s the key.’ ‘If you’re happy, tell each other.’ ‘Love means you’ll change the cat box.’ ‘If he’ll hold your hair back when you have to throw up, it’s definitely love.’ ‘Kissing is gross, but I guess hugs are ok.’ ‘Love is when he knows you’re wrong, but doesn’t make you admit it.’ Eyes shining with tears and laughter, she reached out to catch the falling snowflakes. Every one was different, just as they should be, each giving her advice about love. Then she heard the giggling. Looking up at the bridge, she saw them. Lined up along the railing, leaning over to toss the snowflakes off the edge, were at least sixty of her students, all waving and smiling down at her, their teachers strung out in a line behind them. She turned to her husband and threw herself into his arms, covering his face with kisses. Joyful tears streaked unheeded down her face. ‘Did you do this for me?’ she cried. He hugged her close. ‘Na,’ he said playfully. ‘Must have been elves.’ ‘I’ve always been very.
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