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I can'tthink of one guy who wouldn't let you practice on them. It's gonna makewearing the condom an unforgettable and enjoyable part of the fuck." My dad," Danny asked, puzzled."Your dad," John replied, "bet he'd enjoy his son as much as I do." My dad," Danny mocked. "Can't imagine him even enjoying sex." Oh he does," John poked. "He does." How do you know," Danny responded, the subject made him uneasy.John didn't answer.They put the dishes in the sink and headed for the door."Um," Danny stuttered. "What about my clothes?" They're in my car, but you don't need them. My windows are tinted andwe're just going to the club."As they drove out of John's garage, Danny took the condom he'd been handedand ripped it open with his teeth. He took it out and glancing at John,popped it in his mouth. He felt the flexible disk laying on his tongue. Hemoved it around, tried the roll it over and over."You're gonna have to work it in front of your teeth and tightening yourlips to hold it in place, use. ’Me: ‘Sure. How much is that?’Bartender: ‘$8.00.’Me: ‘Here you are. OK now, what’s the wifi password?’Bartender: ‘ “youneedtobuyadrinkfirst”; No spaces and all lowercase.’----Prince Harry’s Bachelor Party - Quote of the DayIt’s really weird stuffing money into a stripper’s G string when every bill has a photo of your grandmother printed on it.”Compliments of technomageUnitarian Universalist jokesQ: What do you get when you cross a UU with a Jehovah’s Witness?A: Someone who knocks on your door for no apparent reason.You May Be A Unitarian Universalist If... you think socks are too formal for a Summer serviceyou think the Holy Trinity is “reduce, reuse and recycle”when you watch Jaws you root for the shark (“Hey, sharks have to eat too!”)you think “Whatever” is a valid theological pointyou think a Holy day of Obligation is your turn to bring coffee hour treatsyou know at least two people who are upset that trees had to die for your church to be built.Q: What is a Unitarian.
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