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’ I paused, then added, ‘Didn’t you ever hear of bisexuals? There’s a growing belief among psychologists that all ‘normal’ people are, to one degree or another, bisexual. Let me ask you this: Do you think Sandy’s a lesbian because she and Louise went to bed and licked each other’s pussies? Am I gay because I willingly sucked your cock? I don’t think so.’ I’ll say this for Jeff, He was bound to punish himself one way or another. ‘All right,’ he said abruptly, ‘let’s have another drink.’ After refilling our glasses, he turned to me. ‘Theoretically, I suppose you’re probably right about this bisexual stuff.’ He paused, then went on, ‘This isn’t easy to say in front of Sandy, but I think you should both hear it.’ He reached for my hand and looked me in the eye. ‘I have serious feelings for you, Jim,’ he said softly. ‘You want to know what I think? I said. ‘I think you’re like a kid with a new puppy. Of course you have feelings. This would be a hell of a world if we didn’t have them.. But I couldn’t let her go, not lose her yet again. “Richard,” she said softly, “you have family and a safe marriage, a wife who loves you, whether you have sex or not. You are committed to her and I think that’s right, that’s what marriage is about. “But you can’t give me that and there is no way I will come between you two. So,” a huge intake of breath lifted her mighty bosom, “we must stop meeting. No, make that I must stop seeing you. I need to get healthy again, to get back to my hobbies and my friends. Sorry, Richard, there’s only one way to do this.” I felt my heart splinter. My head was pounding, my pulse racing and sweat bubbled in my armpits. I couldn’t speak. The lumps in my throat almost prevented me from breathing. Is this how Gaynor felt all those years ago when I walked away, leaving her sitting in the corner of a dismal bar? Gaynor’s hand settled on my thigh. “I will always love you, Richard and I’m glad in many ways that we met up again. You’re a good man but you.
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