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Hanging around with the girls as I did I developed certain effeminatemannerisms and the boys in my year at school noticed this. I used to bethe victim of quite a lot of bullying. For a while they used to call menames like "gay", "faggot" and "pantywaist". My friends were all girls.We would complain to each other about the boys' behaviour.And half the time I would wonder what I was doing that was soeffeminate? If I could have stopped I would have. I wanted to beaccepted by the boys as I was by the girls.My parents were worried, as they had noticed I was unhappy and they hadme see a psychologist.I remember he told them not to worry. He said I was more mature than theboys of my age and also more intelligent. I would go to a goodUniversity but most of the boys in my year would get jobs stackingshelves in supermarkets or warehouses. I should hang out with the girls.I was already doing that.So my parents, having mapped out my future happiness, stopped worrying.There were a few. ’ Anna stared at her darkly for a few seconds, then dropped her eyes, sighing loudly as she did so, ‘I’m sorry. I was way outta line there. I guess I’m just a bit jealous that you’re having so much fun and making loads of new friends in a strange place without me and Vicky to back you up like we always do. And I guess it’s doubly worse because I don’t want you to forget us when you’re with your posh friends or get ashamed of us for reminding you about your ‘ghetto’ life.’ Kainene shifted to Anna’s side and dragged her in a big hug, ‘don’t be silly, Anna. There’s no way I’d ever forget you or Vicky. You guys will always be my closest and best friends. How do you know I wasn’t a bit jealous that you guys will be so close since you guys are still together in the same school and I’d feel like the third wheel when I came back here on hols? But that’s just stupid insecurities that friends normally have when they’ve been away from each other for a while. Lorna and the others have definitely.
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