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.. is two eggs sunny side up; and a pair of running boards ... are 2 slices of crisp bacon!”“Oh ... OK!” said the blonde. She thought about it for a moment and then spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer.The trucker asked, “What are the beans for, Blondie?”She replied, “I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires, headlights and running boards, you might as well gas up!”FOR ONCE THE BLONDE GETS EVEN!!!CuckooBefore leaving to attend a Doe party for her best friend, Muffy promised her husband Bob she would be home by midnight.Well, the party was great, and the drinks went down way too easily. Muffy was a bit loaded when she headed home about 3am. Just as she got in the door, the cuckoo clock started up and cuckooed 3 times. Quickly, realizing Bob would probably wake up, she cuckooed another 9 times.She was really proud of herself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution in order to escape a possible conflict with her husband. (Even when totally smashed.... Then I got an idea. My mind was a buzz. Could I really do it? Would I really go through with it?I took the bottle with me back to my room. I opened my old toy box in my closet and removed an old Penthouse I had hidden inside. I made myself comfortable and slowly started to stroke myself to the pictures of tits and clits. Before long, I felt that tingle that started to spread through my body. I continued to stroke, but just as I felt it rising, I sat up and aimed my dick in to the top of the salad dressing bottle. I let out a slight grunt and I felt myself cum. Spurt after spurt shot out of me and in to the bottle. After several more strokes I didn't feel anymore juice flowing and removed the bottle from the end of my dick. I could see some of the cum on top of the dressing in the bottle. I just sat there and smiled. After a minute, I got up and cleaned the dressing from the end of my dick and put the top back on the bottle and returned it to the refrigerator. My mind.
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