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Fear gripped me as questions shot through my head. Was she an e****t? She didn’t say that on the phone. What kind of gifts is she asking for? Is that a tactic to get around prostitution? What did I get myself into? My thoughts were interrupted as the bathroom door opened and she stood there, her negligee open, displaying her gorgeous, statuesque body. Some of my fear abated but I still felt stupid not understanding what she wanted. My eyes ran down the length of her body from her face, to her c-cup breasts, to her crotch…wait, where was her supposedly huge cock? There was nothing there. WTF? She slowly walked towards me, keeping her legs tight together. I assumed she was walking that way in an effort to walk sexy…was I wrong. She stopped in front of me, my face about a foot from her crotch, when she suddenly spread her legs and un-tucked her massive, already rock hard, cock. It was definitely 9′ but that wasn’t the most impressive feature, it was thick, almost soda can thick. How the. ”The first one begs, “Thom, please tell us what the presents are.”My phone rings, I look at the number and I say, “Sorry, this phone call is important.”It’s the FBI. I answer the phone and they deliver some serious information. I hang up the phone and begin to formulate some ideas...The wedding planner is droning on - it’s boring as hell so I decide to have some fun. I raise my hand, she looks at me and says, “Yes, you have a question?”I grin and reply, “I’m not sure why we’re going through all this falderal. Isn’t my job to just stand up beside Bernie?”If looks could kill, the look that Jens gives me would have done it. The wedding planner states, “I guess you have never been a best man before. You have many responsibilities: First you have to help Bernie choose a tuxedo...”Bernie interrupts, “ ... I’ve already done that.”The wedding planner continues, “ ... You need to plan and attend the bachelor party...”Bernie again interrupts, “ ... We’re not going to have one of those.”The.
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