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I wasn't happy about being next to the occupied stall, but big things were afoot.I was just getting ready to bear down when all of a sudden the sweet sounds of Beethoven came from next-door, followed by a fumbling, and then the sound of a voice answering the ringing phone. As usual for cell phone conversation, the voice was exactly 8 DB louder than it needed to be.Out of Shameful habit, my sphincter slammed shut. The inane conversation went on and on. Mr. Shitter was blathering to Mrs. Shitter about the shitty day he had. I sat there, cramping and miserable, waiting for him to finish. As the loud conversation dragged on, I became angrier and angrier, thinking that I, too, had a crappy day. But I was too polite to yak about it in public. My bowels let me know in no uncertain terms that if I didn't get crapping soon, My day will be getting even crappier.Finally my anger reached a point that overcame shamefulness. I no longer cared. I gripped the toilet paper holder with one hand,. " Maybe so," Carla laughed, "but I'll bet that waitress will be telling about your breakfast for a while, not to mention the tip. That's probably the most she's seen anyone eat in her life. They would go broke if everyone ate that much. It's bound to be the most grits she's seen eaten – ever." Well, shit," Fred said, embarrassed. "I was hungry. The two of you almost killed me," he quietly answered. Then louder, "I was raised on a farm. I learned to like grits when I was a kid. Besides, they use real butter in there, and they weren't bashful about how much of it they dumped in that big bowl with the grits. The grits were darned good. Hell it was all good." Well, so long as you keep your strength up," Carla laughed. "You've got two women to service tonight."Fred opened the doors for the women and they got in. While he was going around to the driver's door, Jessica reached past the seat to touch her mother's arm. "Uh, Mom. I think I'm going to have to pass tonight. I'm a little – well a.
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