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”“Well, that’s the last straw,” says the wife. “I’ve had enough, I want a divorce!”“I can understand that,” replies her husband, “but remember, if we get a divorce it will mean no more shopping trips to Paris, no more wintering in Barbados, no more summers in Tuscany, no more Jaguar in the garage and no more yacht club. But the decision is yours.” Just then, a mutual friend enters the restaurant with a gorgeous babe on his arm.“Who’s that woman with Moishe?” asks the wife.“That’s his mistress,” says her husband.“Ours is prettier,” she replies.✧ ✧ ✧A JEWISH DIVORCEA Jewish daughter says to her mother “I’m divorcing Nathan.” “All he wants is sex, sex and more sex. My vagina is now the size of a 50 cent piece when it used to be the size of a 5 cent piece.”Her mother says, “You’re married to a multi-millionaire businessman. You live in an 8 bedroom mansion. You drive a $250,000 Ferrari. You get $2,000 a week allowance. You take 6 vacations a year and you want to throw all that away over. I stood up, there were several well dressed ladies coming, going, crossing, and looking pretty. The men had claimed one, two, six, or were trading girls amongst the available ones and each other. I felt curious and I saw one man, awkward in an autistic tech teenaged millionaire kind of way, examining my driver. I wasn’t having that. I grabbed the back of The Valkyrie’s neck and kissed her deeply. I hardly had to lift my heels of the ground to reach her mouth. It was a bit unsettling. She looked starry eyed and goofy when I pulled back. That surprised me. I imagined I had that look on my face after my first kiss.“Nice lipstick, Brian,” Rena edged me aside so Valkyrie could help Ellie out. Rena wiped a handkerchief across my mouth.“Is she working a double shift?” I asked Rena. The Valkyrie was leaning down for Ellie to whisper in her ear. The tall woman blushed.“No, she’s got a niche as one of the drivers or a stewardess, if we’re sending the island plane to pick you up.” The island.
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