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When he heard the shower he smiled; “Somebody doesn’t want to smell of sex,” he thought. He had just poured a third, but far more modest glass, when the sounds from upstairs indicated that the lovers would soon be coming into view. They would be almost at the foot of the stairs before he was visible to them, but he rose when they were part way down. “Hello my darling, hello Sean.” The guilty pair froze. Alice had gone white. “Ron?” she gasped and was about to say something else, but her husband held up his hand. “There is a peculiar surrealism and some black humour here,” said Ron. “Come into the lounge both of you, I need to explain something.” He stood back to let them pass and then turned his chair. “Sean help yourself to a drink and pour a very large G&T for Alice please; you’re going to need it.” In a dream-like state Sean served the drinks then sat on a chair away from Alice. Words began to flow from them both in a torrent of sorrow and regret. Pledges of love from Alice. Right there.”“Oh, O-Ok,” Emma said. She wasn’t entirely shocked by that after sending him the picture but also wasn’t expecting that level of directness. She pulled off her clothes in record time and tossed them on the couch to her left. Naked in Mike’s living room, she stood silently at attention while he just stared at her, looking over her body.“Shit, you really did write that on yourself. What did you use?” he asked. His tone had lost a bit of its nasty edge.“Sha-Sharpie,” Emma stammered.“You know that permanent marker doesn’t come off of skin, right?”Emma did NOT. The thought had not occurred to her at all in her panicked state before. She shook her head, eyes wide.“I have two friends,” Mike told her casually, “that are roommates. And idiots, both of them. One of them wrote ‘Dummy’ on the forehead of the other while he was sleeping. As a gag, for no reason. With permanent marker. The second friend had to have his sister show him how to cover it up with makeup for a month. He.
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