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?My artwork seemed to suffer as a result.?I needed more.? I needed?thepresence of a woman. Most people probably thought I was either crazy orlecherous.? And while I cannot deny thoseclaims in some capacity (I am a man after all, not to mention something of aneccentric artist), I hold a certain amount of respect for women as figures ofpristine art culture. The day I put up an ad on the campus bulletin board for afemale art model, I didn?t really know what to expect.? Most women I came across either already hadboyfriends, were seldom ever artistically inclined, or point blank they justthought I was a pervert.? I certainly gotteased by my art colleagues who said I was desperate to find a girlfriend?butreally?my desire to create art goes deeper than that. To me, art is akin to sex?absorbing every color and shapeinto oneself and capturing the feelings and emotions one experiences in and outof the canvass onto paper.? There hasnever been a day that goes by when I felt I could not treasure. When I finally did notice it freaked me out. He stared at me the way a girl with a crush would. I made the mistake of making eye contact with him. He smiled at me but I got nervous and turned my attention back to the teacher. I wondered if anyone saw him looking at me. I didn’t want anyone thinking I was a fag. Stephen spent the rest of the semester staring at me in class and I tried to ignore him. I’m pretty sure others noticed. Well the semester was over and I figured I’d never see him again. My second semester somehow me and Stephen were in art class together. When we made eye contact in class I was surprised to see him and he seemed a lil’ pissed seeing me. After a few weeks the teacher paired me and Stephen together for a project. We had three weeks to complete it. I avoided him the first week. He would come up to me in class and try to make plans but I blew him off. The next week I went up to Stephen and apologized and promised to make myself available. The.
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