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" It did too. I looked like a drag queen." You did not!" Lisa," I said, "haven't you told me a thousand times that if I felt asthough I looked nice, my confidence would carry me over when I was out inpublic?" But you still looked pretty!" But I didn't feel pretty," I said.Lisa sighed. "Let me tell you something, sweetie," she said. "Beingfemale isn't necessarily all about wearing skirts and heels and makeupand wearing what we want to wear. As women, we can't always pick andchoose what outfits we are able to wear on a given day. Take our workuniforms, for example. You might like wearing pantyhose every day, butthere are plenty of women who don't." My legs look better in pantyhose," I said."And now many pairs have you gone through in the past month?"She was right; I'd learned early on the pitfalls of catching a calf on acorner of a chair. And the trick of using nail polish on a run on mythigh in order to prevent it from stretching down below my hem beforegetting the opportunity. “Your car? Or can I take our truck?”“‘Our’ truck?”“We’re in town on company business. Carl’s got a company truck. I’m his assistant, so I ride with him.” I saw Carl over across the room still talking to his deputy. “Or I can get the keys from him if he’s going in one of your cars?”“Hey, Brant!” my deputy called. “You get that last call?”“Yeah,” came the answer.“You wanna let these two follow us to the office in their truck?”He scanned the bloody mess of Carl’s pants. “Yeah, that’ll work.” He started guiding Carl towards the door. Carl stopped.“Problem?” he asked.“Yeah ... I didn’t pay...”The bartender and the waitress were standing there.“How much...” Carl asked.“Nuthin’,” the waitress said.“Hon,” Carl replied, “we ain’t that kind of people. Here’s a couple of twenties...”“That’s WAY too much, sugar,” the waitress said.“So sneak me free onion rings next time,” Carl smiled, pushing the money across the bar.Out at the truck, he opened the camper shell’s side hatch.“Whatcha looking.
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