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I’m not kidding, after lecture there will be a queue, ten deep, offering me proposals and questions. What are you? Where are you from? Please meet my parents. Will you marry me..? Fuck sake, it’s endless. They’re obsessed with me. They treat me like some kind of deity, so I started calling them pilgrims.The problem is, technically I’m one of them. I’m mixed race, half Bahraini, yes I’m as hot as the desert and half English – hence the foul mouth. I dress in Western clothes and possess a liberal attitude. The whole package drives my South Asian classmates mad.It’s not that I have a particular problem with my South Asian pilgrims either, they’re usually good looking, kind hearted men, who are for the most part very clever. But they want to marry me.... right away!Despite changing careers, it was no different while camming, where I get bombarded with emails asking my ethnicity. Of course I can’t tell them the truth, Bahrain is a small island, not to mention highly conservative. If word. ”“I am recording this, ma’am, and will play it to Richard as soon as I can catch him with a free minute or two. Bye, ma’am.”Diane thought her husband should be made aware of the situation, and phoned him. As always, he answered at once, knowing any call from her would be important.“Yes, Diane?”“Bob, one of my teams has spotted the reptile on a stony beach about fifteen miles along the coast towards the next city. Its estimated size is twenty-five feet long – just under eight metres, so pretty big. Currently it appears to be sunning itself on rocks, but may move. My team will keep a safe distance from it and make sure no-one else comes near. That is the update as I have it.”“A nasty piece of work, if it goes on the rampage, my dear. Does it have big teeth?”“I haven’t got any detailed data or pics yet, Bob. We are operating a 100-foot perimeter at present.”“Keep everyone well clear, Diane. We don’t want a disaster scenario on the news.”“I have it in hand, darling. Don’t fret, my.
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