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. which hotels were the best for the uninitiated, and what sights to recommend seeing, customs and culture stuff ... all that that you never really get without actually being there. I also gave her tips on what Americans did that pissed off nearly everybody in other cultures, so she could warn them not to do that kind of shit. She had her own apartment now, over on the other side of town somewhere.I called Claire first. My mother hadn't told her I was coming home, as I had asked. She wanted to surprise her too."Hey" I said into the phone."Bobby?... Bobby?!" squealed Claire. I hadn't been all that good about calling in the last five or so years."Hi Claire Bear," I said. "I missed you." Bobby?" she squealed again. "Where are you?" Well, at the moment I'm in our parent's house. I have my old bedroom back and everything." You're home?!" she squealed. Claire was a good squealer. She squealed in bed a lot too, or used to."Yeah, I kind of got hurt and they kicked me out. You wouldn't know. As we got in, Trista told the cab driver where we wanted to go to as she laughed hysterically. When I asked her what was so funny she said, "I'm pretty sure that everyone in front of the hotel saw all your business up your skirt you stupid slut. You can't even keep your legs closed getting into a cab."My face turned beet red. We arrived at the restaurant and I concentrated on getting out of the cab in a half respectable manner. Trista giggled at my concentration of simply leaving the cab.We walked into the restaurant and Trista talked to the hostess. My knees were literally shaking as I assumed that every eye in the place was on me. In a way it was true, everyone seemed to be checking out my outfit, but no one was really gasping that I was a guy who had been made to cross-dress.Trista came over and said that our table was ready. I followed her as she followed the hostess through the restaurant. This time all eyes were on my short skirt and high heels. I wondered if they thought I was.
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