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It took all my willpower to not get intimate with her. I slapped her playfully on the ass as she wiggled it walking towards her bathroom. In my head, I briefly considered getting naked and surprising her in the shower, but I refrained. “What clothes do you want to take with you?” I yelled at her.“My luggage is in the back of the walk-in closet. Put some bras and panties in the bag. Pick three dresses, and five other outfits and put all of that in the big bag. Take the smaller bag, put my makeup in it from my dresser. Open the top drawer of my dresser and pull out some pantyhose. Go to the bottom of that same dresser and find a couple of corsets that you would like to see me in. I have about a dozen, take what you want to see me in. Also, at the top shelf of my closet I have several stripper shoes, most are 9” stilettos, bring as many of those you would like me to wear for you.” She tells me while in the shower.As she is taking a shower, I do as she asked and filled the luggage. I. The dreaded "C" word. Cancer. Uterine cancer, which, by the time it was diagnosed, had metastased. The doctors had tried heroically to save her, and did extend her life by a year or so, but that was all. She hardly had time to say goodbye.I barely made it through the funeral. My oldest daughter, herself distraught from the loss of her mother, had to care for me like a baby. I couldn't think, could barely breathe, and didn't want to. The kids settled Claire's affairs; I wasn't capable. Eventually though I had to try and have some sort of life, even if it was without her. That's how I ended up as a troll.Yes, a troll. You know the kind. Lives under a bridge. Grumpy. Doesn't want company. A long time ago, I read a series of essays called Magic Harbor1, by a fellow named Don Berry. In one of the essays, he described himself as a troll. I find myself in a very similar physical and emotional situation. I live on my boat, not under a bridge - that doesn't work well with a real mast - and.
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