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I opened the doorand stepped out into the soft rain. Supplied with only a water bottle, I started walking down thestreet towards the park where I usually stopped to rest. I gradually went intoa jog, then a run, then a sprint, then back down to a jog again until I gotto the park. Stopping at a bench in the park, I put down the water bottle andwalked out into the trees and bushes, taking a trail I always took to cooldown while I walked. As I started to jog again, having been thoroughly cooledoff, I looked down at my breasts. I watched them jiggle and bounce as I ran,and noticed the way that my breasts ended and directly under, my stomach wentflat. Shortly after, I was sticking my hand in my top and pinching the softnipples. Hold on a sec. Virgin doesn't mean Virgin Mary, okay? Oh, how badI felt, how incorrigible I was! I had gotten a little more than half way throughthe trail, and had just started back when I heard a rustling in the bushesto the left of me. I quickly pulled my hand out. Is it that postpartum thing? You don't seem crazy." No of course not," I replied."Do you need to see a doctor?" No, I don't need to see a doctor." Do you want a divorce?" No, I don't want a divorce." At that moment I realized that it wasn't just a passing comment. Martin was considering a divorce. If I didn't do something, I was going to lose everything. If he found out I might lose it all anyway. My mind raced should I tell him or try to keep the secret."Should I just ask your mother?"A cold fear ran through me. If he asked her, she just might tell it all. Her version wasn't the whole truth, but it would surely be enough to drive a wedge between Martin and me. One that might not be repairable. I couldn't breath suddenly. I wanted to run away, but I knew I didn't have anywhere to go. Running wouldn't change anything at all. I would have to return. Unless I told the truth, it would be even worse when I got back."Martin, this is not a good idea." Is it that bad?" he asked quietly."Yes.
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