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I can still remember the feeling that we’d arrived; I looked down and felt I was home. Such a feeling of peace.Then we got closer and the noise began to drift up. The dream was destroyed. Drunks in the street, fights breaking out. There were too many people for this city to soak up, it was overcrowded, smelly and unpleasant.A drunk fell against Branka and the donkey staggered, Mary nearly fell. I said something like ‘Careful mate’ and this guy rounded on me, red faced and angry. Drink does that to people kids, take note.” Joseph had never got so drunk he lost control; unlike many he had never hit his wife, nor come home late, full of booze and insisted on his conjugal rights. He was a good match for her. “Anyway he swung wildly and I hit him, hard. I would have hit him again, but Mary just said ‘No, leave him, no violence tonight’. And we walked on.We tried The Blue Boar, The Emperor, The Two Birds. Even the whor-, I mean the lower, less respectable places. Every tavern was full. I. I made it through the AIDS era. I was not entirely unscathed. I had two abortions. Those tiny skeletons are buried in another part of the closet. One I refuse to open, one I refuse to remember. The bones of their fathers are buried in there as well. One father I didn’t know. The only time we spoke was at his arraignment. He was my rapist, though, I consider him nothing more than just another lover. I was with him longer that night than most of my one night stands. It shames me to know that while he was violent and demanding, to me he was nothing more than a roleplay gone awry. He cut my ‘cunt’ open with a beer bottle and left me on the side of a road to bleed. I’ve had lovers do more damage to me with their words. The other father of a set of baby bones was a lover I coveted. He was a vampire, metaphorically. He sucked me dry in every fashion someone can suck the life from a person. He drained my blood, because he was kinky. He drained my emotions, because he was an emotional.
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